Here is my weekly garden progress photo. Tomorrow the 80 degree sunshine days start so the veggies will really shoot up then.
- This morning, before I went to the post office I checked the oil in my truck. I noticed the oil filler cap was missing. I looked for it thinking that it could have fallen down and got caught somewhere in the engine compartment, but I didn't see it. So I went to a parts store and almost bought a new one. The cap the part salesperson had in stock didn't look like it would fit so he and I took it outside to try it on my truck. As soon as I lifted the hood I saw my old cap sitting on top of the air filter housing. I had placed it there the last time I put oil in the engine and forgot to replace it. Just one more incident illustrating the disappearance of my short term memory.
- Yesterday, Dorothy made some chicken salad and we had it on sandwiches for supper last night. To this chicken salad she added grapes, apples, and pecans. I'll have to admit the flavor was not bad. But my mouth rebelled at the texture. This is not man-food! This is yet another illustration of the chasm that exists between the male and female psyche. If a man plans to cook chicken his thoughts run toward barbecue sauce or spicy batter to dip the chicken in and deep fry it. Cole slaw and potato salad are a natural choice to accompany a chicken dish. It would never occur to a man to add grapes, apples and pecans to a dish that contains chicken. I know Dorothy has been cooking for 40 years and I've only been at it for about 18 months, but I think she might benefit from my expertise if she ever asks for it. I wonder if KFC is open.
- I have Hunter and Jenna with me today. I'm able to write this post because I've fed Jenna a lunch of a Zinger, a corn dog, some animal crackers, and a strawberry-banana smoothie. Then I changed her diaper and put her down for a nap. Speaking of changing diapers, here's how I do it just in case any of my readers hasn't done this and wants a few tips: First, you have to prepare a place. I put a towel down on a bed and then get the wipes ready and the diaper in place with the Velcro tabs pulled out and ready to go. If you don't make this basic preparation you will be sorry. Next, play with the baby and get her laughing. If you can keep her laughing and jovial you can pull off a diaper change without her knowing what happened. (This is a theory of mine that has rarely worked successfully in real time). Ok, now grab her ankles with one hand and lift. Quickly pull out the nasty diaper, use the handi-wipe to tidy things up and place the new diaper under her. Don't breathe during that last step or you will have another mess to clean up. Now, bring the Velcro tabs around and secure them to the front of the diaper. This step needs to be completed in less than a second because a baby can flip over and start crawling off the bed very quickly and if you lose your grip on the ankles before you're finished with the handi-wipes she will flip over, crawl away from the towel and sit up smiling at you. That necessitates washing the bed comforter (preferably before your wife gets home). So, if you can follow my directions and learn to successfully change a diaper, it will do wonders for your self-confidence and you will certainly impress the women in your life.
2 comments:
You have this diaper changing thing down pat.
When our boys were babies, Mr. Fixit could change diapers (cloth ones with pins and then plastic pants) better than I. The diapers he changed molded their little bottoms with no gaps around the legs. The ones I changed were apt to fall off and were prone to leakage. I think it must have been his military training. If you had dropped a quarter on the baby's butt, it would have bounced.
We've already picked some banana peppers from our patch. Yum! The tomatoes are growing nicely too, as are the tomatoe worms. Unfortunately, the scouts "feel bad" for the worms and refuse to kill them.
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